DAY 139

July 31, 1999

I am sick today!!!!!!!

Waking up on the sofa in the common room, the warm, bright sun was making me even more sick. I managed to get up, take my sleeping bag back to my tent, and very slowly I made my way to Shawn and Kevin's tent. This is a feeling I had told myself a loooong time ago I would never let me feel again. If only I could vomit maybe I could feel better. Needing to talk to someone and make some sense to my clouded memory of last night, I proceeded to wake up Sean and Kevin by sitting on the ground throwing small chunks of dirt on their tent. Shawn got up but Kevin wanted to sleep longer. I moved very slowly as Sean walked toward the bathhouse and talked to me. He reminded me of some of the things I was talking about which was nothing really. Mostly I talked about how I was hoping I didn't make an ass out of myself at the Pit and lose the respect of my friends there. While he went inside the bathhouse I laid on the cool ground like a dog. The shade and cool dirt soothed me and made me feel a bit better. I was feeling very miserable and knew that this day was going to be a waste. All I wanted to do was go back in time and cut myself off on the tequila so I wouldn't allow myself to get drunk. Sean and I talked for quite awhile, rather he was nice enough to keep me company in my misery. Soon, I made my way back to my tent and slept most of the day.

In the early evening I talked to Andy and was feeling well enough to go through some photos with him. Andy is a tall, thin, lanky guy with long hair and a goatee. He was working the door at the Pit last night and assured me that I wasn't that drunk "just groovin'". I had been debating on whether I should end my journey now, but Andy strongly encouraged me to continue. I thought that after my Dawson City experience, there was nothing else to look forward to on the road to Prudhoe Bay. And since my knees had been hurting again, I was ready to catch a ride to Whitehorse and fly home. The day I rode with Jeremy to Whitehorse both knees began hurting for no reason at all about 2 hours into the ride. It became excruciating and I couldn't figure it out. I had done nothing to cause it except the fact that my legs were stuck in one position riding in a vehicle. And last night I was woke up with excruciating pain in both knees during the night.

Anyway, I gave Andy some of the photos I had of people dancing in the tent at the music fest. He was in most of the photos I took. Andy was all over the place just groovin' out there on the dance floor. Sean and Kevin were both great in encouraging me as well. Man I felt lucky to have these guys to hang out with that had a sincere interest in me and my journey. Both of them promised to keep in touch with me. They were going to use a computer in the office to follow my journey after I left and threatened to tell a bunch of lies in my guestbook. So if they sign it and say a bunch of unbelievably crazy stuff about me, don't believe it :) They are very funny and I'm gonna miss them when I leave.

So my mind is made up, I will leave on Monday after I mail my journal entries and photos when the post office is open.


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