June 10, 1999
I heard about a need for a PT in this area today. Initially it was very appealing, since a temporary contract person was coming in for a couple of months. That would give me enough time to complete this journey and return here to work. Because you must know by now that I must return here as soon as my journey is through :) I spent the day preparing a resume', sending and receiving faxes, and working on state licensure. Then when I called later in the evening, 6pm, the time I was told to call back and discuss the position, something didn't feel right. All day I was very excited about this possibility, I could return here and have a job. But the conversation just did not give me the right feeling inside. Everything was all the sudden getting too complicated. The earliest I could be interviewed would be Tuesday and there is no guarantee I would be hired since I was competing with other applicants. Something inside was telling me that this was not the right thing to do now. Looking towards my inner self, I seek direction. The only answer that comes is for me to finish the journey. There is still much for me to learn so that I can achieve heights like Jonathan Livingston Seagull, and break away from those barriers that prevent me from truly being free.
Too many people are stuck... stuck in a job they don't like... stuck in a bad marriage... stuck in a wrong town. I know if I follow my inner self, it will eventually lead me to the right people and places. But first I must be true and honest to myself so that I can be true and honest to those around me. Once I can fully break free from the mental barriers keeping me from that state, I know this journey will be completed, no matter where I may be geographically. Although I feel that I've been very open and honest to all those around me, something inside is telling me that there are many lessons I still need to learn before I finish.